Categories
Family Relationships

Making Memories

Life passes us by just with a blink of an eye. Our tomorrow’s are not guaranteed. Heart attacks, strokes, car accidents, and now Covid…are just a few of the various things can take a person away, changing so many lives unexpectedly. People grow up and apart as life has us all so busy in trying to keep up, leaving one another behind. So, we have one thing that we can look back on to remind us of better days that are now behind. Memories.

Memories are a way to look back at time and never forget the closeness we once had with those that meant so much to us during that season or period of time. Memories can be captured in so many ways. So, what is holding you back from capturing the time that you have been blessed with, with those who are valuable to you and still present in your life?

The question isn’t whether or not the day will come, but WHEN the day comes that you are no longer able to see someone you love so deeply, who impacted your life so tremendously, you will want something to remember their voice again, their being. You will want to remember what they looked like as their image in your head will begin to fade with time, slowly. One day if you are lucky, you will wake up older and will want to take a look back at moments that occurred in your life. These things that keep the memories alive are what will lighten your heart again.

Here are 6 Different Ways to Capture Memories

Take Too Many Pictures
So many have become shy around cameras, but little do we realize that those are the things that family and friends will be left with when we are no longer around. Not only that, but as I mentioned above, we become so consumed with the responsibilities in our lives that time passes us by. A picture is only a moment in which time is still, but tells a story that is kept within our hearts. Take those pictures and have something to look back on with a smile.

Video Recordings
When you see your parents dancing or your siblings acting silly, take the opportunity to make it a lasting memory. To laugh back at or just remember the simpler times. There have been so many times where my family and I pull out old video recordings from many years back and are just so grateful that someone captured that moment. When there are times that some people can’t be around family, such as today because of covid, that is when these recording will warm the heart. These recordings will rush you back to some wonderful memories that you forgot even happened.

Take Advantage of Voice Recordings
Thanks to Build-A-Bear, we can now record our own voices into teddy bears. These gifts do not have to be particularly for children, but husbands/wives, parents, friends, and your brother/ sister will also treasure these bears with great sentiment. Many times when someone passes away we often, not purposely, forget the sound of their voice. Even keeping a voicemail of a simple, “Hey, its me. Call me back.” is special. Oh, how so many wish they can hear the voice of a parent or spouse who has passed away.

Make Clay Hand Molds
These were a big hit a few years back and I never really thought about how special these clay molds are. They tell about a time when your child was small and could barely stand on their own. Years later, it will drift you back to memories of how their tiny fingers held onto yours as they slept. This can be done with an elderly Mother and her adult daughter holding hands. Time is precious and doesn’t keep those we love around for very long. An anniversary memory with Husband and wife clinging hands. Clay hand molds are such an amazing way to make a lasting memory.

Write Letters
Letters express feelings and emotions that we once forgot others had for us or we had for them. Many times a letter to ourselves is just as an important memory as the one to a loved one. These are great memories to have, because they shed light on the exact thoughts you once had. Our thoughts, there are millions, but when we write them in a letter that is one thought that we can actually remember. Not too long ago my sister pulled out a letter from my niece from 10 years ago, and though it took us so long for us to figure out what she had written (She had just learned to spell, haha), it reminded me of the phases she was going through at that time in her young age. Her message to me was, “I need Superman and Robin to beat up bad guys and save the universe.” At that time, she was into superheroes and I remember I always pretended to be Robin and her Superman. Letters are just as meaningful as pictures just processed differently.

A Valuable Object
When we think of something valuable we think about shirts, jewelry, gifts. But, that’s not so much what I am talking about when I say valuable objects. Though the ladder are also great things to keep and cherish. What I mean, however, are movie tickets from your first date. A flower you picked from the ground when you were on vacation with family. Perhaps even a cup from a football game you took your dad to for his birthday. You can add these into a memory scrapbook that you can look back on years down the road and share with your grandkids.

Capturing the Moment

No matter what it is you are doing or with who, there are always ways to make memories from that day with that person. We don’t have forever and as I mentioned, these are the things we are left with as time passes. I have kept so many things from my school years and though some of those friends and I have lost contact or have just moved on with life in a different direction, it is still nice to look through them and remember the times we all had together. The way to making memories is putting your pride and shyness aside and capturing the moment, in the moment. You won’t regret taking that picture or recording, but you will regret not having it when there is nothing else to look back on. Cherish the time you have and make memories. Every moment can be a memory.

Categories
Family Health Holidays

A Covid Christmas

We had a feeling this Christmas was going to be different, but we all were hoping for a better outcome. Things will be better soon, but in the meantime, with one of the most celebrated holidays we have to think outside of the box when it comes to our safety and gatherings.

As we so desperately want to spend the holidays with our family and friends, Which I get, we have to remain mindful about not only our health, but the health of our children, parents, and extended families. Not everyone has underlying conditions, but that still does not mean that they are safe from this virus and cannot suffer tremendously if contracted.

There are some ways to prioritize your safety and well being during this holiday season. Here, I am going to help you figure out how to accomplish this, if you cannot absolutely go without being around others.

3 Ways to Set the Tone During a Covid Christmas

1. Communicate clear boundaries
Remind your guests that they are welcome, but things will be different this time around. Now, I know not everyone accepts CDC guidelines and what-not, but you as a human should want to make a difference in people’s lives in a non-selfish, positive way. This means, masks aren’t a bad idea. I would also suggest making them wash their hands as they come into your house. This should be a part of good hygiene, anyway, especially during flu season. Staying 6 ft. from one another is another wise choice to make. Shoe covers are another barrier against inviting covid inside your house into your rooms/kitchen/ restrooms/ etc., that you will eventually step on and spread onto your bed. And NO SHARING DRINKS. You are probably looking forward to taking shots with your company, but I highly doubt you will be keeping track of who’s shot glass belongs to who and if you’re taking shots, chances are you won’t think clearly and could care less. That is up until you begin feeling symptoms a few days later…. One important thing to remember, after everyone leaves, sanitize every part of your house. Doorknobs, light fixtures, restrooms, sinks, toilets, floors, couches, tables, chairs…. basically – EVERYTHING.

2. Set the standards
Not only do you all have to think about yourselves, but also about the other guests that will be around everyone else as well. There is no telling who they can possibly come in contact with for the next 14 days after leaving your house and who’s body cannot fight a virus such as covid. Let’s keep an open mind and remember those who have a weak immunity and even those who don’t know that they do actually have an underlying condition. This applies to you as well. Safety begins with you and your household rules. Right now, your choices may affect someone’s life, even someone who you don’t personally know. Be responsible and caring.

3. Skip gifts and enjoy the time instead
This couldn’t be a better idea for many reasons. This year has been hard on a lot of people, not only in a health perspective, but financial situations have been shaken. Some have to save their every penny they can as jobs aren’t as secure as before. Jobs that are open today may shut down tomorrow. Layoff’s may be a companies only resort to stay afloat. Not to mention, exchanging gifts may also include exchanging covid. Skip gifts this year and instead focus on the guests that are able to attend and cherish making those memories. As we may have figured out, this year was the year of being grateful for those we do have in our lives and appreciate the moments spent in togetherness.

Remembering Those Who Choose To Stay Home

Christmas is a time to be with those you appreciate and love the most. Though, this may not be an option for many that does not mean they cannot be a part of the memories. Visit virtually with those who cannot join you during this time. Set time aside to make phone calls to them and send them Merry Blessings.

Stay safe. Protect yourself and the little ones who depend on you to protect them. Keep the peace. Laugh, Love, Make memories, and maintain a safe distance from everyone else. Merry Christmas and may this be the last Christmas that’s been pandemic-tized!

Categories
Friendships

What Fake Friends Do

Friendships makes our lives interesting and can have a positive impact in our lives. There are friends that we can count on when we are going a rough patch in our lives. Friends can be there for us when we are feeling lonely on a holiday. And there are friends that we can confide in about our fears and secrets. Friends are impactful in our lives and some even become family – Chosen Family.

Then, you have those friends that drain your energy from you. They are the ones that make you question their friendship after leaving their presence. Those are the ones we label as, “fake friends”. Everyone has had one of those and perhaps you don’t even realize that you have one of those yet. Whether the friendship is long term or newly discovered, you want to be sure that the person is indeed a quality friend. And sometimes that is hard to spot!

To make things easier for you to tell, I have listed a few characteristics of what a “fake friend” could have.

Eyeball roll your success
Some will bitterly and insincerely smile at your success and others will flat out roll their eyes at you and tell you to calm down with all of your happiness. Your success is incredibly offensive to them and they can’t hide it. They will never celebrate your success because they see it as their loss. If they aren’t the only ones succeeding, they aren’t happy for anyone else.

They are judgemental
You should be able to talk to your friends about anything without feeling that you are being judged. If you cant speak your mind or talk about your issues without them judging your every move and calling you out on what you did wrong every sinlge time, then perhaps they aren’t truly your friend. You don’t want to end up feeling worse about a situation that already hurts you to begin with.

They use you
When you don’t hear from your “friend” until they need or want something that says a lot about who they are or who they aren’t. I know life can get busy with work and whatever problems life throws, but if you are not thought of and checked on every now and then, you aren’t as valuable to them as you thought. You are sadly being used.

They put you down
If your friend throw’s shade at you every chance they get they really aren’t a good friend. Telling you that you have gained weight insensitivly and in front of everyone isn’t what a friend does. Ridiculing you shouldn’t be how they “get along” with you. And that side-eyeing you isn’t cool either and yes you do notice it. It’s time to let that fake “friend” go!

They don’t really listen to you when you speak
You could be crying your eyes out about your failed relationship and they just sit there filing their finger nails while chewing their gum loudly with their mind obviously on something else. You deserve to have friends who listen and give you their undivided attention when you are at your worst, at your best, and in between.

They gossip about others in the circle
You know that one friend that you cant tell too much to because your personal life problems will spread like wildfire. How do you know? Because they told you about Sarah’s deepest secret and lets not forget she told the clique about Ivonne’s personal issue. Oh, that’s right she also told everyone about Tonya’s bad news. Yup, that’s not a good friend to keep around, babe!

They lie to you
A friend who lies to you all the time isn’t a trusting friend at all. You may have had a lunch date with them and they cancelled on you because they had an “emergency”, but later saw their tagged photo on facebook of them out having brunch with other friends. Friendship is built on trust and if they lie to you, they aren’t really your friend.

They are jealous of you
A friend that is green with envy is a dangerous one. They will try to shift attention away from you. They may be upset that you make more money than they. Some will even be bothered that you are growing mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. Whatever the case, there is no telling what a jealous friend would do to get you down.

They flirt with your partner/spouse
There is nothing more disrespectful than a friend who comes visit you and flirts with your mate the entire time while you watch. These friends must never know your personal relationship business and should never be trusted alone with your man/woman! So, if you can’t go pee while your “friend” is there, then that is a HUGE red flag that that friend does not respect you and truly isn’t worried about you or your feelings.

True friends will have your back always and want the best for you in everything. They truly care for you despite your flaws and respect your every decision. The friends that you should have in your corner are the ones that nurture and maintain the friendship and check in on you especially during your hard times. A true friend loves you at all times.