Protecting Your Energy

Have you ever been around someone that just made you feel uneasy and couldn’t put your finger on it as to why? Well, if you didn’t know then you know now, that was your energy trying to tell you that something is off. It warns you about others. Our energies pick up on those who are bad news. It can pick up on those who really don’t like you around and pretend to be loyal to you. It can pick up on someone who is trying to harm you. Your energy is something that is not be shaken, but when threatened it will certainly ring loud bells for you. When your spirit picks up a bad vibe there is no comforting it until they are well away from you. Then your energy will go back to its normal state, leaving you thinking, “What the hell just happened to me?!” Our energies warn us when we are around danger. It helps keep us safe by shaking us when we are not. Everyone needs to listen closely to their energy and how certain people make it react.

Some people can walk into a room and give this calm, soothing feeling that makes you feel relaxed, cozy, and welcomed. Those are the vibes we all want to be around. Then, there are those that walk into a room and leave you feeling unsettled. You are suddenly panicky and ready to leave. They don’t sit well with your spirit and you should not force it. If the people that put out the kind of energy that makes you feel sick to your stomach and on edge are the people that you cannot completely cut off from your life then there are a few things that you should do to keep from having to sage yourself off afterward. However, know that it is okay to snip people right out of your life to keep all well with your soul. There is nothing wrong with tolerating people from afar.

Set boundaries:
Make sure that you put out the energy that gets you respect. You don’t have to be liked by anyone but you damn well deserve to be respected by everyone. You don’t have to do this aggressively at all, in fact, that is not necessary. All you do is respect everyone and they will reciprocate that same energy even if they don’t want to. Your energy is so positive that they will feel like they have to show respect and that’s exactly what you are trying to accomplish. You need to be respected. You set that boundary. They will quickly catch on that you are a meritorious woman.

Be you:
Who cares who likes you and who doesn’t. You are living your life for you and no one else. So let them give those bad vibes out like candy all you need to do is block ’em like Kobe. Laugh, have a good time, dance, and keep your happiness regardless of their misery. Don’t allow anyone to dim your bright shining light within you. You smile and keep doing you regardless of what vibes they are throwing your way.

You can be nice, but you don’t have to be friends:
Know the difference between being nice and making friends. A well raised person is nice to all people even to those that aren’t deserving. However, that does not mean that you have to be their friend. You don’t have to hangout. You don’t have to exchange social media information. You don’t have to take selfies together. You don’t even have to strike up a conversation with them. All that is needed from a classy woman is a simple “hello” and that is all.

Avoid them:
Lastly, my very own personal favorite. When there is an event that I know I will be surrounded by uncouth people who give off sneering energy I don’t even waste my time. There is no one and no event so important to me that I will put my own energy through hell for. I will avoid putting myself in any place or situation that is not peaceful for my soul and you should do the same. I will not go to a party and soak up all the bad vibes only to leave feeling regretful that I did that to myself. That takes too much of me to try and force myself to be at ease when my soul knows it is not well around them. I will not paralyze my very own spirit to allow someone else’s disdained spirit consume me.

It is our priority to take care of ourselves and that includes our spirit, our soul, our energy. There may be times that you may feel doubtful and think it is all in your head that you are making yourself feel that way, but do not do that to yourself. Do not suppress your thoughts or neglect your feelings. That is a sure way to drain your soul every single time. Set healthy boundaries to protect your energy. Learn the language of your body and know when it is on high alert and around who. It is a force of nature, so do not silence it, but listen to it. I have gone and will continue to go to great lengths to protect my mind, soul and energy, will you?


Anxiety and COVID

I have become so homesick while being at home. It’s like everything I’ve ever known about life and living is changing right before my eyes and I don’t know what to do with it. As a child, I always went to my mom to feel better, to feel safe. She was what helped me in times of uncertainty as any mother would for her child. But who do I run to now? I’m a grown woman who has to figure this out and be strong. I cannot be around my elderly parents during this time of crisis, for their own health is at stake. And to be around my siblings is just as bad. I, too, am a mother and I know my own child is clinging onto me for support and consistency. But what do you do when that consistency your child is longing for is no longer possible?

Weekends were always a good time. Holidays were a sure thing to be spent with family and friends. Birthdays were celebrated with those we loved. Work was a safe place. And on other days just hanging out with friends and going shopping or to the movies was never a bad idea. The world as we know it has been changed and it’s something that is hard for all of us to wrap our heads around. For some, it is even harder for our minds to accept. Dealing with anxiety, change is already a challenge. Add chaos to the world and not seeing your family, now that’s just a disastrous feeling.

Millions of people may be experiencing mental instability right now with this virus hovering over the world. It is especially wearisome for those whose family are battling the virus and maybe even themselves. The stress is overwhelming and the unpredictability of our tomorrow only intensifies this feeling of uneasiness and discomfort. As much as we would love to be in control, we must remember that we simply can’t. The only thing we can do is remind ourselves that right now we are breathing. Right now we are alive and we will make it out of this.

Finding Ourselves Amidst COVID
We have to try to live life in such a way that doesn’t remind us of our everyday struggle with the virus. I am not saying don’t wear your mask and go out into crowds and visit people! No,no,no don’t be doing all of that, WE ARE TRYING TO FLATTEN THE CURVE, PEOPLE. Stay at home and do things that will help keep your mind off of the craziness. Wake up in the morning, make your bed (a made up bed gives such a serene feeling) and drink your water and coffee. If you never were one to work out, start! Do a few jumping jacks, a couple push ups, some high knees and maybe a couple squats. Take your bath while listening to some crunk music that really gets you motivated and moving. Dress to impress, yes even if you aren’t going anywhere…. You better do your make-up, do your hair and put that “feel good” outfit on. If you look good, you will feel good even if its just a little bit. Anything counts when dealing with anxiety. I’ve done it for years and this works most times. Open up your blinds and doors to let that beautiful sunshine beam into your home. The brighter your space, the better you feel. Sit down and scribble out what you would like to accomplish today whether its clearing out that closet, re-arranging your spice cabinet, or just jotting down what you need to make it a relaxing day for yourself. Whatever you do, avoid the news. That just causes more anxiety. Figure out what you are going to cook and do it with some music on whether its gospel or rap, just anything that gets those hips moving and back to your happy place. Dance while spicing up those ribs! Once the sun goes down a bit go outside for some fresh air. Even if it’s to sit on your porch steps, just take some deep breaths and find yourself back in peace. Water your plants and grass. Go for a little walk around the block. After a day of keeping your head as clear as can be there is no better way of bringing it to an end, but with a steaming hot shower and some calming music to heal the soul. Massage your scalp as you shampoo and condition, massage your neck, shoulders, and feet as you soap up.

The Reality of this Disorder
I know that anxiety is hard to deal with. I, myself, have dealt with it for years and still continue to struggle with it almost everyday. There is no way to make this awful, gut-wrenching feeling go away completely, but the above could help. Even if it is just for a day, it helps. I know our heads seem to want to explode with emotions and thoughts. Anyone can say, “Try this, it helps” and it won’t mean a thing, but it is really up to us, ourselves to make us feel okay. There are days I find myself lost and all I can do is pray and pray, all day. That is what helps me. It may not help 100% of the time and when it doesn’t I have to figure out another way to crawl out of that black hole that anxiety tends to pull us into. Do not do things that will drown you further. As bad as you want to dwell in your bed and let it sink you in, get up. As bad as you want to curl up on the floor and cry all day, do it for a few minutes, instead. Though you may not have an appetite, food will help, try one bite. Your headache won’t go away and you don’t want to move, take an Advil or Tylenol and lay on your couch and watch some Netflix (nothing depressing, please!). There are things we can do to help ourselves, nothing is too small or too big to help manage our mindsets. You are not alone, we are all in this together even though it seems as though everyone you know and love is 100 miles away from you.

If you have not dealt with anxiety before in your life and have not been feeling like yourself, perhaps you are feeling off and just out of focus, then you may be experiencing some form of anxiety.

Here are the list of common symptoms that you or someone you know may be experiencing with anxiety:
• Nervousness
• Feeling of being in danger
• Feeling of uneasiness
• Palpitations
• Rapid breathing or hyperventilating
• Chest pain or tightness
• Sudden sweating
• Trembling or twitching
• Feeling weak or faint
• Unable to focus or think clearly about anything other than the problem
• Nausea
• Dizziness
• Feeling of losing control
• Feeling like you are going crazy

If you cannot control this on your own that is okay. It is always okay to not be okay. Consult with your doctor if you feel like this is out of your hands and you can’t find your way out. Never be scared or ashamed to ask for help.