Have you ever noticed that kids want to talk more right before its time to go to sleep? It’s not that they completely are trying to avoid sleeptime, but its actually the perfect time for children to open up. Bedtime routines bring feelings of intimacy and closeness with their parents allowing them to voice their concerns about whatmay have happened throughout their day at school or with friends. This is why, bedtime is perfect to let your children know a few important things that could really make a difference in their lives.
You Are Proud
Let your child(ren) know how proud you are of them. This helps them know that they are doing things right. This also helps them focus on the positive. Feedback from parents is essential to maintain a good connection with them. And feedback is something that you will continue to give throughout their entire life so its best to guide them in the right direction early on. Telling your kids you are proud of them is not just to say it, but this also helps them in developing their own sense of pride and accomplishments, which have no age limit.
You Believe In Them
Encourage your child to never give up. Failing is okay, every one fails. It is the times that they get back up to accomplish what they want that matters most. Parents have to let their children know that they believe in them. Sticking with your child through thick and thin is exactly what they need especially if they didn’t get the grade they expected on their science project or if they failed to catch the ball at their baseball game. If you give up on them they will grow up with that same mentality and end up giving up on themselves as adults. Strong willed children end up growing into leaders who do not get bent up when something goes wrong in their plans.
Bad Days Happen
Children will have bad days and when they do they depend on you to guide them in the right direction. Remind them that bad days happen, But that doesn’t mean that it is a reflection of who they are and that just because they had a bad day today it does not mean that they shouldn’t look forward to having a great day tomorrow. Comfort them and let them know the day has already happened and now they can focus on the good things that did happen. Practice reflective listening during this hard time with them. Each time they feel heard it brings the emotion down and they can see whatever made their day so bad, as what it is and not make more out of it.
You Support Them
Tell your child that they will always have your support. We get so busy in life and making sure our children eat, do homework, chores, and bathe that we get distracted from the most important thing: How our children feel. Let your child know that no matter what happens you will always be their number one supporter. It is crucial for them to know that you will always value their views and opinions. Just a simple, “I will always support you no matter what.” will open up the door for them come to you with their fears, thoughts, and impressions about anything and everything. Reassure them that you are listening and not judging.
You Love Them
When you are angry with your children, you love them. When you are happy with your children, you love them. You love them when you wake up, when you drop them off at school, and when you are busy making dinner. They need to know that there is no one in the world that could love them as much as you do. They need to know that you love them unconditionally even amidst disagreements and arguments. Let them know that your love for them is not one that fades away or could ever. Regardless of who they are, what they do, who they become, how they perform, what they accomplish or don’t accomplish, they will always have your love. Love tells them that they are valuable. It gives them courage, hope, and joy.
When kids feel a strong sense of acceptance and love they develop a positive self esteem and they feel safe and secure not only within themselves, but you as well. Talking to your kids before shutting down for the night resets their thinking for a better tomorrow with the confidence that they need. Letting our children know that they can talk with us about anything will encourage them to deal with whatever they are feeling outwardly instead of holding it all in. Take the time and talk with you kids tonight and see what a difference it will make.