Friendships makes our lives interesting and can have a positive impact in our lives. There are friends that we can count on when we are going a rough patch in our lives. Friends can be there for us when we are feeling lonely on a holiday. And there are friends that we can confide in about our fears and secrets. Friends are impactful in our lives and some even become family – Chosen Family.
Then, you have those friends that drain your energy from you. They are the ones that make you question their friendship after leaving their presence. Those are the ones we label as, “fake friends”. Everyone has had one of those and perhaps you don’t even realize that you have one of those yet. Whether the friendship is long term or newly discovered, you want to be sure that the person is indeed a quality friend. And sometimes that is hard to spot!
To make things easier for you to tell, I have listed a few characteristics of what a “fake friend” could have.
Eyeball roll your success
Some will bitterly and insincerely smile at your success and others will flat out roll their eyes at you and tell you to calm down with all of your happiness. Your success is incredibly offensive to them and they can’t hide it. They will never celebrate your success because they see it as their loss. If they aren’t the only ones succeeding, they aren’t happy for anyone else.
They are judgemental
You should be able to talk to your friends about anything without feeling that you are being judged. If you cant speak your mind or talk about your issues without them judging your every move and calling you out on what you did wrong every sinlge time, then perhaps they aren’t truly your friend. You don’t want to end up feeling worse about a situation that already hurts you to begin with.
They use you
When you don’t hear from your “friend” until they need or want something that says a lot about who they are or who they aren’t. I know life can get busy with work and whatever problems life throws, but if you are not thought of and checked on every now and then, you aren’t as valuable to them as you thought. You are sadly being used.
They put you down
If your friend throw’s shade at you every chance they get they really aren’t a good friend. Telling you that you have gained weight insensitivly and in front of everyone isn’t what a friend does. Ridiculing you shouldn’t be how they “get along” with you. And that side-eyeing you isn’t cool either and yes you do notice it. It’s time to let that fake “friend” go!
They don’t really listen to you when you speak
You could be crying your eyes out about your failed relationship and they just sit there filing their finger nails while chewing their gum loudly with their mind obviously on something else. You deserve to have friends who listen and give you their undivided attention when you are at your worst, at your best, and in between.
They gossip about others in the circle
You know that one friend that you cant tell too much to because your personal life problems will spread like wildfire. How do you know? Because they told you about Sarah’s deepest secret and lets not forget she told the clique about Ivonne’s personal issue. Oh, that’s right she also told everyone about Tonya’s bad news. Yup, that’s not a good friend to keep around, babe!
They lie to you
A friend who lies to you all the time isn’t a trusting friend at all. You may have had a lunch date with them and they cancelled on you because they had an “emergency”, but later saw their tagged photo on facebook of them out having brunch with other friends. Friendship is built on trust and if they lie to you, they aren’t really your friend.
They are jealous of you
A friend that is green with envy is a dangerous one. They will try to shift attention away from you. They may be upset that you make more money than they. Some will even be bothered that you are growing mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. Whatever the case, there is no telling what a jealous friend would do to get you down.
They flirt with your partner/spouse
There is nothing more disrespectful than a friend who comes visit you and flirts with your mate the entire time while you watch. These friends must never know your personal relationship business and should never be trusted alone with your man/woman! So, if you can’t go pee while your “friend” is there, then that is a HUGE red flag that that friend does not respect you and truly isn’t worried about you or your feelings.
True friends will have your back always and want the best for you in everything. They truly care for you despite your flaws and respect your every decision. The friends that you should have in your corner are the ones that nurture and maintain the friendship and check in on you especially during your hard times. A true friend loves you at all times.
12 replies on “What Fake Friends Do”
I really enjoyed this post. It’s a topic that bots really talked about often. I’ve lost a friendship last year that really drained my energy because that person seem to just wanted all of me whenever.. As if I didn’t have a life. There was jealousy and alot of insecurity. I’m so happy that I have moved on from that. Best decision I made. Thanks for sharing these great tips to look out for.
Thank you for reading. It really is important knowing who is in your circle. I’m so happy that you had the wisdom to know that it was time to leave that friendship behind. Nothing is worth that kind of negativity. XoXo.
Nice post. I was just nodding my head when I was reading this and realized I have some fake friends.
I have recently cut some people out of my life for carrying some of these traits…. Nothing is worth having people like this around.
That looks like a list of qualities of people who are more than just fake friends but are really horrible people. Having such people in your life can really mess you up if you’re not careful
Oh, you’ll be surprised how many of these people are best friends with the most sweetest people. Gotta stay woke, that’s for sure!
It’s so important to recognize which of your “friends” are really truly your friends. Too often we find ourselves allowing people in our circle who don’t deserve it and aren’t actually there to support you and be your friend. These are great pieces of advice, thank you for sharing!
I totally agree. Many times we invest our time and stay loyal to some who are undeserving of our love and respect. Thank you for reading!
I completely agree, though many fake friends are a bit harder to spot.
Oh, for sure I totally agree. The signs vary drastically! But if you can catch the ones with these basic red flags, then you can slowly pick up on who’s loyal and who’s playing you. Thank you for reading this.
I deald with a lot of fake friends in 2019 en 2020… since I cut them out I feel so much more relaxt and at piece. This post is really helpful if you don’t see the signs…
I am 100% with you. Cutting out those people really makes a huge difference not only in the energy around you but your self esteem as well. Thanks for reading.